It’s supposed to sting

I am determined to fight for what’s right, and fight openly, because I feel I haven’t done enough in the past. It’s time to challenge myself to challenge the world I live in. After this point, when I see something, I need to say something.

This morning, I saw something. This post came across my Twitter feed. One of the many  “it’s not going to be that bad” posts. Let’s see what their reasons are. Maybe they can convince me. I want to be convinced that everything is going to be all right. I started reading… people are scared, the writer is scared, ok, fine.

Then the “my husband voted for Trump and he’s not a monster!” section started.

“I’ll tell you a secret. My husband isn’t a racist, sexist monster (though after being a police officer for 21 years, he is a bit jaded by the people he has encountered). So seeing posts that a racist, sexist nation elected the President stings.”

Let me tell you a secret. IT’S SUPPOSED TO STING.

When you do something wrong being called out on it serves the purpose of making you think about why you did it and why you’re justifying, excusing, and giving it a pass. We ARE a racist, sexist nation. We elected a man who has said and did racist, sexist, and ableist things. WE. All of us. I didn’t vote for him, but I didn’t fight against it hard enough.

I’m not asking anyone to divorce a spouse over political differences. What makes me angry are the excuses, combined with who he is and the power he wields. I am asking her to seriously question why she is excusing a spouse, who she mentions is a police officer, for voting for Donald Trump.

A police officer voted for a man who said the the Central Park Five were guilty (even after being exonerated), and had advocated for death for them.

A police officer who voted for a man who stated that he gropes women without asking, and that he can get away with it because he is rich.

A police officer, who she herself states is “a bit jaded” by the people he comes in contact with in his job.

She’s worried about people hating her and him.

I’m worried about people like her husband killing people of color and the mentally ill because they are afraid and because their experience has “jaded” them about those people’s guilt.

Don’t worry though, she “sent up a prayer” that it’s all going to be all right. Great, lady. I hope it made you feel better. Now what are you going to DO to make those wishes happen?

Am I speaking from a place of white privilege? Probably, but that’s all I got. It’s who I am. And as much as my voice is one that no one wants to hear…I still matter. Everyone does.

This is the part that really kills me. That’s not all you have. You have a brain. You have the experiences of being a woman in this world. Take some of those experiences and use it to apply empathy to the experiences of others. You’re aware of white privilege, but then you use it to complain that no one wants to listen to you because of it instead of using it to help others.

In one paragraph you say everyone matters, but you center it on your hurt. Center it on why we as a country don’t act like everyone matters.

Understand why it scares us that a police officer can hear someone admit to crimes and then still vote him into a position of power, and then go right back to work in his own position of power.

Tell your police officer husband about the reasons why the people he is so jaded about are afraid of him.

Explain to him why women don’t report rape in a world where a man can be elected after outright stating that he gropes women and walks into their dressing rooms because he has the power to do it with no consequences. The police officers that these women have to deal with think that’s not a reason not to vote for him?

I hope it stings. You want people to stop being angry about this because it hurts your comfortable feelings. I am angry that your feelings seem to outweigh the actual fears and dangers that other people who aren’t like you are going through.

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